Monday, February 20, 2017

Literally Just 26 Really Funny Tweets From Mark Hoppus






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ID: 10552840























2.
















































ID: 10553048























3.
















































ID: 10553029























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ID: 10552718























5.
















































ID: 10552797























6.



















THIS IS NOT A PHASE, MOM!!!


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10552752









































8.



















HOW DOES CHEWBACCA KNOW WHERE TO STOP SHAVING HIS PUBIC HAIR?!


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10552845























9.



















Goal for today: make fetch happen.


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10552883























10.



















ten minutes into blink-182 and chill and he gives you this look.


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10552847























11.



















frozen 2: frozen af


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10552884























12.



















You can have my hands when you pry them from my cold, dead wrists.


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10552886























13.



















Girl at the rock show: What?
Me: ¯_(ツ)_/¯


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10552742























14.



















It's getting less and less likely that in my life I will have the opportunity to vomit into an active volcano.


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10552887























15.



















Don't fuck with someone taking a photo with their iPad because they're already at rock bottom and have nothing left to lose.


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10552889























16.



















Don't waste
Your time
On me
You're all sweaty
And gross inside my bed


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10552800























17.



















Here’s my brother Gene who we haven’t seen in years since he moved away we miss you call me 📞


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10552976























18.



















Hi I'm Mark. My wife is shopping and I'm standing here trying not to look like an asshole and it's not working.


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10553006























19.



















[leaves you on *read* for three hours]


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10553019























20.



















Someone a few houses over is having a party. I can hear the music and laughter and people enjoying themselves. I'm calling the damn cops.


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10553021























21.



















[logging into twitter 2012]: Do you have any updog?
[logging into twitter 2017]: Does our beloved republic still stand?


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10553022























22.



















The clown emoji is worse than when my parents got divorced.


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10553032























23.



















if i ever die please make sure my funeral has a fire snapchat filter.


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10553039























24.



















For Halloween I'm going as "Dractually," a mansplaining vampire.
⚰️


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10553053























25.



















woman behind me at this restaurant is laughing saying she never orders french fries but always eats her boyfriend's and i'm boiling w rage.


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10553091























26.



















Roses are red
Violets are blue
Garlic bread
blink-182


— Mark Hoppus (@markhoppus)




ID: 10552739



































Thumbnail image: Getty / Alberto E. Rodriguez




























ID: 10553236

















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